Wow i havent blogged since the 22nd of August, pretty long ago, but anyways decided to blog since i need to clear my head a bit. I need some moment of clarity so i though blogging would help.
A lotta stuffs been happening in the past few weeks, uni exams, living by myself for like a week, then with my dad for a week, mum and sis coming back from philippines, a bunch of inflows and out flows into my life. It's been pretty up and down, and i think now im pretty much on a down. Too much saddening shit is happening. My uncle is in hospital, i remember he called like on Monday asking for my dads number, and i asked my dad why my uncle called yesterday, he told me cause he needed a lift to the hospital cause he was getting operated to get a tumor removed from his brain. At that moment this sinking feeling of sadness just overcame me, i then asked my dad if it was cancerous but he said he didnt know if it was or not. So im just kinda waiting for whats to happen. It's really been bugging me and yeah its kinda stressing me out. My uncle is like the greatest bloke. He's always been so nice to me and jsut been caring. It's just a weird shit feeling inside of me.
Also to add to this, the main reason why my mum and sis went back to philppines was to accompany my grandparents back to Australia, cause they needed help getting back cause my grandpa is sick, turns out a day after they came back my mum was panicking and i asked why, said that my grandpa was in hospital. It's been pretty rough, i should visit him soon but fuck, this has been all too fked up.
I don't know how to feel about things, i try to be happy but i end up being sad. It's really just all confusing and just completely depressing. I don;t know where i stand atm in my life, things have just been fked up. Ive been pissed off lately, i hate texting someone and not getting a reply. I've been sending countless texts to someone over the past week, but i havent gotten one single reply. fuck sake. fml
Anyways i think i better just chill off for now. I'm getting pretty shitty.